We All Need Solitude

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Someone from the near past said to me, “We all need solitude every now and then.”

It’s a gift of chance we could give ourselves – a chance to detach ourselves from everything needing logic, purpose, and reason; a time to just co-exist with all the rest without having to say a word. But really, it’s more like a chance to let yourself do nothing but think, and think, and think.

Solitude. Its silence. This silence that is almost holy, I better watch my every move before I could make a sound, better not stir up the serenity. No, of course, it’s neither heaven nor the happiest place on earth, but I feel safe here. Because in this solitude, it’s easy to talk myself through every realization, happy thoughts win all the time, and a smile could be so powerful it’s easy to get by with even just a hint of it.

And when I come out, may I go on living day by day like I’ve never doubted life, never questioned love. May I smile back at it, and believe in love once again. After all, I’ve been keeping my faith in this love I’ve always loved.

For now, this is all I need – this solitude, this time to pick up these pieces of me. I have it, I’m happy. 🙂

We All Need Solitude

Check out this really amazing way to decorate your Easter eggs! Please please please life, spare me even a little time for this, pleeeeease! 🙂

Field Notes From Fatherhood

Easter eggs 2012(2)

With Easter approaching I thought I’d share this previous post. If you have time, you really must try this, whether you have kids or not. It’s, well, super groovy. (Oh, and you can check out last year’s batch here.)

Last year I was searching for something different than the tired old Easter egg packets with the tablets, something that would get the kids more engaged and that would use only natural dyes. I came across a very cool project, tried it with the kids, and was stunned by how well it came out. Here’s how to do it.

First, prepare your dyes. Fill a number of pots with just enough water to cover an egg, then add your dye ingredients. You have a wide variety of choices.

  • Onion skins will give you a rich rust-brown color, redder if you use a combination of yellow and red onions.
  • Red cabbage…

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Written For Nothing

My dearest,

I woke up from a dream that I wouldn’t want to end; to thoughts of you just so wonderful, to a story hand-written by God. This must be a lovely day – one to celebrate in the name of this love we discovered a year ago.

The situation wasn’t easy, but the decision was; and in fact, I never had to make it. I only needed to say it so you’d know. It came as a surprise for you because you never thought that one hellish busy day could end up with the green light switching on to begin all that’s simply beautiful. I chose 8 simply for what the world has always known: 8 being the symbol of infinity or forever. And then it happened to be the number between my favorite 7, and yours, 9. Right, laugh now!

Forever. The word alone, what sense could it make? It’s the broken promise, the sweetest lie, and the fairy tale no one should believe in. But on that night, I believed in forever like I’ve always believed in every “happily ever after”, because on that night, forever, in your voice, sounded like every true story told, every love story to unfold.

I thank God for entrusting us this love, from which we learn to understand things beyond our own understanding. I’m more than happy to go through all this with you, because quite honestly, there’s no place like in your arms; that I wouldn’t have to worry about the danger because I’m safest there. Laugh and I’ll kill you!

You told me you couldn’t promise forever. Who knows what could happen next, right? I felt sad at that, but then again, I believed in forever…more than ever…when you promised to do your best to make this last forever. That was daring, touching, not a fairy tale at all. I felt my blood at that, and somehow the fear of a challenge proposed by no young love. But right that moment as well, I thanked the universe for the conspiracy it had planned for all that to happen in a time and place so serene.

Love, it’s been an amazing year, what more could I ask for? There is, indeed. May God hear me now that I pray for one more year for us, two, three, four, forever. Would that be too much, my Lord? Well, I hope not, because if God would let me choose one story to keep, I’d choose this, and I’m choosing this now, lifting it up to Him, so He could write on about us, about a fairy tale blessed to come true.

I’ve got so much more to tell, but I’m gonna have to start prepping up for a dinner date. So stamp  this now with a kiss, take a shower, blah blah blah and then put on your favorite shoes, because we’re gonna have a good walk on this damn good night. Don’t forget the keys, and catch you in a few for some cheers to our first.

All my love, M

A letter, which could’ve been written in messy handwriting, on paper pasted at the back of a painted canvass; one you could’ve been holding right now had there been something to celebrate today and until now.

Written For Nothing

A Day So Ordinary

I am not the happiest person in the world; there’s a lot to feel bad about, worry about. Everyday I wake up to the annoying rooster alarm on my phone. Gotta get my ass off a clingy bed every morning; laboriously pull myself to the shower and suffer the paralyzing coldness of water while mentally noting my to-do list for the day. Chase time. Quietly rant myself through traffic. More traffic and a discouragingly long line to the elevator. D-U-H.

But ironically, these painstaking items in my daily routine are a few of the many things I’m thankful for. They ignite the day, toss me up into the beautiful daylight, and kiss me hopes for a life rich in chances and second chances. 🙂

And then, every so often, expected or unexpected, memories nudge you somewhere; oftentimes at the heart. Bad and sad ones start to tease you. You stop and inhale. And then, you keep yourself busy again, things running and rushing around your head. You stop and exhale. Breathe. Breathe. Take it from down under, breathe in; take it through every part of you and up, breathe out. And back to your monitor!

People, life is both boring and interesting. It’s just a matter of perspective. Find every chance and every second to enjoy what you’re doing. Stop and breathe. Smile. 🙂

A Day So Ordinary