Out of…waiting

There’s a couple of reasons to feel “deyyym” good today. Aside from the 38th anniversary celebration of my school organization (in college), it’s my older brother’s 2_th birthday! I’ve drawn two cartoon e-cards and posted them on Facebook for my organization and my brother. It was fun!

For my brother
For my school organization

And it could’ve been more fun, even in the simplest way, had I not been nudged forever by the thought that I’ve been waiting…pretty too long. And I guess I just had all the emotions I needed to make something as sullen as this, out of…waiting.

Soledad (water-based poster paint)

I’ve been imagining this painting. If you’ve read Something To Paint, I mentioned “a ship’s silhouette on abstract background.” But admittedly, this isn’t exactly the way I’ve painted it on my mind. During the conception of the idea, I was imagining a more sullen ambiance with a higher contrast on the abstract background with the dark tones winning. I saw the ship was that of Jack Sparrow’s Black Pearl rather than one looking only a little bigger than a canoe; the Black Pearl seeming so small against the vastness of the Atlantic. No white light coming from a red moon and born to the ocean waters. No horizon. And so my hand had it its way.

Though long have been painted in my imagination, I never had it brought to life until now, and I know why.

This must be how sad I am. Yet having painted it two tones lighter than how I saw it, I must’ve unknowingly tried to rummage through my sad thoughts to seek for bits of good. And I’ve been trying to betray myself with the comforting thought that I should rather enjoy basking in this self-seeking solitude.

Unfortunately, it’s not solitude I need right now. Not now.

Out of…waiting

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